I am so glad I don't have a daughter. Why? Well… I know that I would be mostly responsible for raising her, teaching her values, and being her favorite role model but I wouldn't be able to control it all…not 100%. Just like I did when I was young, one day she would look around and start checking out other women, finding other people to admire, to look up to, to model herself after. And that's when I would get scared. I would want to ban television from her life so my child wouldn't grow up to be a fool.
Where is this concern coming from? From my issues with Reality TV. I don't even watch a lot of it, but I don't have to. Clips from the most outrageous segments are shown on the news, talk shows, newsmagazines, program promos, and recaps like The Soup. They're kinda hard to miss.
I used to think that the chicks on The Jersey Shore were pretty bad. Not so much anymore. One could argue that they're young and allowed to be foolish…even reckless because that's what your youth is for, right?
I'm talking specifically about the insulting language, screaming matches and, worse, physical fights. Really? Where do they find these women? I mean, think about it; think of all the adult women you know personally and those you just know of. Do you know any who behave that way? Any who have been in a physical altercation with another woman? No, right?
So if I explain away the behavior of Snooki and her crew because they're young, what do I say about these grown women? They embody all the behaviors I would have identified to my Non-Existent Child as being completely unacceptable in any circumstance…yet these low-life acts are tacitly praised. These women are mostly attractive and well-dressed so they look presentable enough on the surface, though in reality (pun intended) they are anything but.
So, I guess I could say it's just tv and everybody knows it's not real. But is that true? These are real people and the fights did happen. More disturbingly to me is that in the past year, I've noticed more and more news reports of fisticuffs between adult women…in a way I've never seen before. It spills over...from tv to real life. It starts to seem acceptable, normal even. If adult women can't resist, how would my young sweet Fake Daughter be able to? I think we owe it to all young girls to be better than this.
Reality Show Women: Reason # 73 I'm glad I'm child free.
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6 comments:
I totally agree. I watched the first season of Real Wives of OC and I found myself hooked into the soap opera "storyline," but then the year after that, and any subsequent casts from other cities, I couldn't stomach. It is entertaining for some, although maybe these are the same people who like to watch cage fighting and the people's court type shows? Maybe sitcoms and dramas have been so lacking in entertainment value, people have turned to this? Don't know for sure.
I couldn't agree with you more. I don't watch reality tv but when I see snippets, my first reaction is embarrassment. If my mom acted like that, I would literally die! I don't know why their kids don't shun them. Maybe they think their screams and stupid fights are cool? I just think this whole concept of reality show is out of control and make women as a whole look petty, uneducated and really immature.
Had this conversation with my girls not long ago. We have over the years disagreed with one another and never come to blows. Its a shame this is what tv has come too, mean ugly no class.
I think anyone who's willing to appear on (read: be humiliated on) so-called reality TV has an attention-seeking nature. We're all media-savvy, and these women know that fighting is titillating and helps whatever trainwreck of a show they're on pull in higher audiences. It's like that whole fake girl-on-girl stuff we see so much of now. It's all tittitainment and helps untalented airheads get noticed. Maybe, if they try real hard, they'll score a lingerie spread in FHM or, the holy grail, Playboy.
As you say, though, such things do tend to spill over into reality in the true sense of the word. My niece, 13, surprised me by saying girls at her school (not a high-achieving school, mind you) love to fight, and she'll happily join in. It disturbs me that somewhere along the line, "female power" became synonymous with either taking on the worst of male traits (rather than, say, learning how to perform at the negotiating table) or, as one teen I heard put it, "blowing a guy's mind" in the sack by acting out all his porno fantasies. Sorry to get so base, but it's all part of that diabolical, misguided raunch culture.
Women have to take a step back, look at this culture and assess how far it is taking us, both as individuals and as a gender. On the positive side, when I look at my friends' kids, especially the ones now becoming young adults, I believe their parents' values have shaped them more than what's on TV. So while these poor role models are around, ultimately it's the parents and relatives who will determine how their daughters and sons behave and what they value. One thing I felt I was never taught terribly well was precisely what gets you ahead in life - how your behaviour affects your chances of success. I think because my parents had no clue themselves. That's one thing that could be emphasised more - seeing that your actions have consequences. Tune in to something like World's Strictest Parents instead - now there's a reality show filled with exemplary behaviour! At least in the end, right?
I think this is very similar to the studies that show that violent games result in more violence in real life. It seems somehow to not only be acceptable but expected. This is so counter to how I was raised and what my gut tells me, it is beyond imagining. And, it's not just the teens who watch this crap - its the 20-something and 30-somethings, as well. That does not bode well for our future - the dumbing down continues even more.
@Janine and @Sandy: That's my real issue. That is bad behavior starts to be seen as normal and acceptable. It certainly pays...at least if you can get on TV.
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