I had breakfast the other morning with two really interesting women. I was meeting them both for the first time on the recommendation of a mutual friend who thought we should know each other because we're all self-employed in businesses where there might be an opportunity to work together. I think he probably dated all three of us at some point, but that's another story...plus, I don't know it for sure, though it's a pretty good bet. Anyway, it was nice of him to bring us together (and to pick up the check).
We are all women-of-a-certain age, but I feel we have the verve of women who are much younger. They both looked really great: energetic, fit, and stylishly dressed. Actually, I should clarify: they looked great...from the neck down.
They both had that weird, too-wide-eyed, skin too smooth and shiny, slightly "off" look of women who've had a tad too much facial work done. I hated it. I was unable to keep up with the conversation because I kept staring at their faces and having my own private conversation in my head: "Do they like the way they look"?
I hate that we have become a society so obsessed with youth that it is almost more acceptable to have bad cosmetic work done than to have a few (or a lot of) wrinkles. And I consider it "bad" if I can tell you've had it.
And here's the thing: I don't know if having cosmetic surgery really fixes "the problem". Many women I see still seem self-conscious and uncomfortable about their age and their looks, even after they've had the work done. It's like a trick has been played on them.
I understand why women go under the knife when they work in the entertainment industry and their livelihood depends on remaining forever young. All others, though? I wish they'd get over it. There's nothing wrong with a few lines and a little crow's feet. You're 50, for Pete's sake!
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3 comments:
Oh wow. I don't know anyone who's had work done. Not sure if it's less prevalent here in Oz or it's just not something teachers do. . . could have something to do with our lack of glamorous lifestyles that stop us. . .Wish you could've posted a picture.
josie x
I live in an area where the stretched fish look of surprise is quite prevalent among women who can't let it all go naturally. It's a personal choice but it seems there comes a time when it just gets scary and looks uncomfortable.
Aging gracefully really requires a total cognitive restructuring, undoing years of exposure to rhetoric like "anti"-aging. Why is aging something that inherently needs an "anti" in front of it?
It's sort of like people assuming Singlehood is bad. The assumption is so insidious no one *realizes* it's just that--an assumption/habit not rooted in reality but rooted in outdated (and largely sexist) social mores and hangups.
We should be anti-skin-cancer and anti-heart-disease etc but not anti-aging itself. But our wierd youth obsession is powerful. As I begin to age myself I really really struggle to remember that IT'S OK to have spots and sags and wrinkles. I must OWN and RECLAIM my spots and sags and wrinkles.
Hmm I didn't realize I had so much to say on this issue.
Christina
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