Indulging in Holiday Festitivities and Still Fitting Into My Clothes

Since the Wednesday before Thanksgiving, my holiday party schedule has kicked into high gear. By January 1, I'll be happily exhausted...and just happy it's over.  The holiday season with all the parties and socializing is always fun, but it's no way for a grown woman to live on a regular basis.  I no longer try to go to all of them, instead choosing the 2-3 a week that I most want to attend. 


The other day a friend expressed concern that she'd "double in size" if she kept up the holiday-party-pace and asked me how I managed to stay in control, how I indulge without overindulging.  I told her, and she thought I should share my "strategy", so here it is:


Speaking loosely, my strategy is to fill up on those foods that are good/better for me, and only have a bit of the other stuff.

• When possible, I try to find out ahead of time what's on the menu.  I generally have a pretty healthy diet  and while I try to stick to it most of the time, I don't deprive myself of something if I really want it.   So if the menu is full of delicious but calorie-laden foods, I'll eat something before I go: a plate of vegetables, a salad, or my favorite: fruit and low-fat yogurt.  That way I won't be hungry when I arrive, and  I can eat a little of what's there without going overboard.

• I alternate each drink with a glass of water.  That's an easy way to pace myself, cut down on alcohol's empty calories, and stave off the likelihood of a hangover the next day.

• If it's a dinner where we serve ourselves, I pile up my plate with mostly vegetables.  I'll take a small piece of meat/chicken/fish but avoid salad dressing, gravy, and sauce.  (I know;  it helps a lot if you really like vegetables).

• I've learned that half a cookie is usually as good as a whole one.  Same for cake, brownie, and pie.   

• Tomorrow, I'm joining a group of friends for our annual Soul Food Xmas festivities.  It's soul food so I'm not even going to pretend to eat healthily. I'm going to have fun! So, all my meals prior to the dinner will be pretty pared down (e.g., egg whites, sliced tomatoes, and a strip of bacon for breakfast, a large green salad for lunch, and a snack or two of fresh fruit). That way I can "throw down" at dinner without being ridiculous. (I'm thinking smothered pork chops will be nice).  

We're only half-way through the season so I'm hoping I can stick to my plan.   I don't have my New Year's Eve plans yet, but in case I have to slip into a little black (or red) dress, I wanna be ready.  I'd love to hear a few other tips that can help... 

 




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Burning the Mortgage!!

A couple of weeks ago I did something that made me prouder of myself than anything I've done in awhile.  I paid off the mortgage on my house! 

For as long as I can remember, I'd fantasized about having two homes.  I was a voracious reader as a child and would often read stories about people who had more than one home (although I didn't know anyone who did).  I thought that was terribly cool and wished I could say one day "I'll be at the country house this weekend".  I loved this notion of having a place in the city and one in the country, and thought it must be the true meaning of "the best of both worlds".

As I got older, I would spend summers with friends in "share houses" in the Hamptons, where a group of us would pool our money and rent a place for a month or the season.  It was fun but I always thought it would be even more fun without all the extra people.  And ya know what?  It is.  Eventually, I was able to treat myself to  what some people call a vacation home, but I just call my other home because I go there more often than I could ever go on vacation.   I had an apartment in the city and was now buying a home in the country...just like I'd dreamed about but never really thought I could pull off.  One mortgage is a big step; two mortgages is even more daunting.  But I did it. 

It was tough sometimes.  My co-op in NYC has a super and I had gotten very used to that.  There's no super with a house and I --being single and all-- couldn't call upon hubby to do the things a super typically does.  And trying to get the boy-of-the-moment to do it can be tricky.  Some are more skilled in that regard than others, so it's a little uneven.  Nevertheless, having a second home was (and is) every bit as wonderful as I imagined it would be.  I love my place in the city, but it's small.  My house in the country allows me to entertain family and friends (yes, even their kids) and it brings me a lot of joy to be able to do that.  And the dog is delighted to have a yard he can run around in on his own and without a leash.

I bought the house in 1996, made accelerated payments and just paid that baby off.  When I mailed in the pay-off check a few weeks ago, it didn't feel like that big a deal.  Now, it's sunk in and it's a huge deal.  When I say I'm a homeowner, I actually mean a homeOWNER.  It's mine, not the bank's and it feels great.  It's one of the most grown-up things I've ever done.  A very Spinsterlicious move!

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Spinsterlicious Shoe of the Week: Did He Cheat?

I was in a very long line at Whole Foods, having stopped in after work to pick up what would pass for dinner.   The “express” line was the longest line I’ve ever seen in my entire life, so I got in the regular line even though I only had a couple of things: light yogurt and an assortment of berries, my very favorite snack…and, in this case, my dinner.  If you didn’t know I was single before, you’d know it by looking at my basket. 

As I stood in line, I wondered how it was that all of New York City happened to be in this particular store at this particular time?  It was ridiculous.  I searched my purse to see if I had my iPod so I could at least listen to music to help the time go by faster.  I had it, but it was dead. I can never remember to charge the dang thing.   So, I’m standing there staring into space trying not to look like the crazy impatient nut that I was feeling like.  (There’s something grammatically wrong with that sentence, but I can’t fix it.  Work with me). 

A few minutes in, I heard a deep voice behind me:  “It must be my lucky day to stand in line behind the woman who can rock those boots”.   It was a little cheesy but when I turned around I liked the way he looked so I forgave him.  I laughed.  We struck up a conversation about nothing much and by the time we got to the cash registers I had agreed to have a drink with him.  We went to a restaurant about two blocks from the store and drinks turned into dinner because I can’t drink without eating…unless I’m trying to get drunk, which I wasn’t.

He was married with children, which I knew before we left the store but I didn’t mind because he seemed interesting and made me laugh.  I assured him I don’t “do” married men (my one hard-and-fast, never-wavered-from rule), and he said he wasn’t looking to be “done” and that he was just killing a little time.   And that’s what we did: ate, drank, laughed and had some good spontaneous fun...all because he liked my boots.   And that’s why they are this week’s Spinsterlicious "Shoe". 

After a couple of hours, we kissed good-bye (on the cheek) and went our separate ways,  not even exchanging contact information.  Yet a friend of mine felt that what he did was wrong.  She said if her husband did that she would feel like he’d cheated on her.  I didn’t agree because it seemed pretty innocent to me.  What do you think?


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Single During the Holidays -- What's Good About It?

What's good about being single during the holidays?  Well, for Kathryn Harvey --big-time advertising exec, sassy lady, good friend, and Spinsterlicious Babe of the month--  lots.    Here's how and why...in her own words: 

News reports say that the holiday season is tough for a lot of people.  Often, the single and childless (but fabulous!) fall into this category.  While I don't look forward to the time between late November and early January as much as I do summer beach weekends, the holidays aren’t all bad.  There’s the parties, the gifts, the music.  And some things about being single are actually better during the holidays.   Here are a few of mine…

• I don’t have to get a tree. Trees are festive, but the needles, the watering, and the space it takes up in a NYC apartment…well, they’re a lot of work.  If I had children, or even a husband, I couldn’t get away with not having a tree.  Way too bah humbug.  But when you’re single no one really expects you to have one.  Score!

• I  don’t have to bake or cook.  And if I do, people make a very big deal about it.   And just as good, no one expects me to send holiday cards.  These days, holiday photos of well-dressed children and/or children placed in really cool, interesting spots (at the family beach house, Macchu Picchu, etc) are the norm.  Since I don’t have any children, I don’t have to send a card.  No postage, no paper waste and no idea-generation on cute outfits or cool spots for the pictures.  If I was married and didn’t send cards, I’d be stricken from every card list, no matter how old or dear our friendship.  But as a single person, no one seems to mind and I still get the cards with the cute kids and the cool locales.  Keep ‘em coming!

• A favorite personal tradition: Every year at Christmas time, my friend, Michael and I have a fancy dinner at a new restaurant. And at these dinners, Michael gives me jewelry.  After one of my break-ups, Michael proclaimed that he’d give me jewelry every year until I had a man in my life.  I don’t think Michael (or his partner, Randall) ever expected this little tradition to last as long as it has.  And while it would be nice to have my boyfriend do this, Michael has really great taste and knows my style.  His selections are always a hit with me and complimented by my friends.  I’d miss all this since I’d probably have to be at my mother- in-law’s between Christmas and New Year if I was married.  Nice!

• Lastly, my sister, Anne, recognizes that I give her, her husband, her 4 children and sometimes her dog, a Christmas gift.  And I travel to her house.  The ratio is way out of whack.  Anne compensates by giving me a larger gift than she gives married family members.   Note to other married-with-children folks: This is a really nice, thoughtful thing to do.  While this isn’t really something that’s better about being single, I couldn’t help myself and had to share this tip.

There are a lot of things that aren’t better about being single, but hey, it’s early in the season, no point to dwell on those now.  They’ll come up soon enough – say, December 31^st.

Happy Holidays!  No trees, no cards, no cooking! 

I (Eleanore) would add to Kathryn's  Good-Things-About-Being-Single-During-the-Holidays list:  I don't have to accompany my husband or kids to parties I don't really want to attend.

Anything you want to add to the list?