Friday, May 25, 2012

Two Weekends in a Spinsterlicious Life

Oh, the Spinsterlicious Life.  It's a mixture of all things good and interesting in life...and delightful juxtapositions.


Weekend #1
Last weekend, I spent some time with three fab single ladies and it was just refreshing to see each of them doing their own thing, having crafted pretty nice lives for themselves.  I see this all the time so it still befuddles me when I hear people question how a single woman could be happy and pretty satisfied with her life, as is.  These girls have it going on!

Spinster # 1 is actually not a spinster because she's divorced…so I've made her an honorary spinster.  She had us all laughing as she talked about how much fun she's having renovating her new place, post-divorce.  Her last renovation --during the marriage-- was fraught with tension and stress as she and the then-hubby struggled over every last detail, trying to find a solution that satisfied them both.  Sometimes they ended up with a compromise that only half-satisfied either one of them.  This time, she's doing her place exactly the way she wants it and she loves it.

Spinster #2 has a pretty cool job in the entertainment field and regaled us with stories  about her travels and the behaviors of nutty, demanding celebrities.  She also told us about being invited, recently,  to a friend's dinner party with four other couples.  She was the only single-ista.  They decided to play a game that only couples could play.  It didn't occur to anyone that maybe this wasn't so nice.  Don't they know any other games?

Spinster #2's story reminded me of attending a wedding and being seated at the Singles table instead of being seated with my married friends (the only other people I knew at the wedding.)  The singles were all college kids who I didn't know.  I can't figure out why it didn't occur to someone that there might be a better solution.  I know; someone I mentioned this to said there's not always a place to seat one person.  I say b.s. to that.  You can add or remove another chair at any table if it comes to that.  It's your wedding; you can do what you want.

Spinster #3 quit her corporate job and started doing her own thing…and she loves it. She makes less money than she used to, but she doesn't care.  (Having a rich-ish boyfriend helps).  She has what I consider to be the perfect "arrangement".  She has a great boyfriend who accepts that she loves and wants him, but is not interested in marriage and kids.  So they live apart; they spend lots of time together traveling and doing other normal couple things, then they go home to their respective places.  I want her life.  (I exaggerate when I say "I want her life".  What I really love is her boyfriend situation.  "Hi, honey.  Bye, honey.")

Spinster #4 is me.  I just got back from the graduation ceremony of a delightful young woman I've mentored for a few years.  I'm so proud of her and get to revel in her successes…without having to raise her!  Just like the boyfriend situation, it's good to spend time with her (and him)…and then send her (and him) home!  This reminds me that one of the commenters on a post I recently wrote said to me, angrily,  "Quit whining. Being single is easy."  I guess he's right in many ways.  I like easy.

Weekend #2
This weekend is Memorial Day weekend, the unofficial kick-off to summer in the U.S.  To celebrate, I invited two of my closest friends for the weekend to jumpstart the season.  In my fantasy-head, it would be just like the old days, when we were free-single-and-21.  Except we're not.  I'm still free and single, but they're married with children.

I didn't have the nerve to say "leave the kids and spouses at home", so they're all coming. Even the dogs.  I say this mostly in jest:  I really love their families...though I am a little concerned about spending that much time with that many children...some of whom are teenagers.  Actually with that many people.  Since I live alone, the thought of being surrounded --sun up to sundown-- by eight people gives me a bit of agita.  I'm sure I'll be fine, and it'll be fun...but y'all should pray for me anyway.  Hopefully I don't end up on the news:  "Lady flips out over too many weekend guests."

But this is my Spinsterlicious life.  I have a full array of friends in a variety of situations and it works just fine.  As it should.  Happy Memorial Day, everybody.  And a special thanks to the troops who protect us...allowing me to spend my time pondering small things like my weekend activities, without having to worry about big, scary things like terrorism.









NOTE: The Spinsterlicious Life: 20 Life Lessons for Living Happily Single and Childfree-- has been published and is available here and  hereand on Amazon.

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